Networking on a Deserted Island

Last week I had the opportunity to attend a networking meeting - which led to an invitation to a networking lunch at my local Chamber of Commerce.

At both meetings, I walked into rooms of complete strangers. And, yes(!) I survived and even walked away with some business cards and with lessons learned. Here are those lessons:


1) Feeling uncomfortable can lead to opportunity. Even though I pride myself on being able to talk to anyone and create small talk with even the stiffest person, I felt really uncomfortable when I knew no one in the room. In 1995, Dr. Phillip Zimbardo of Standford University's Shyness Clinic reported that 88 % of people consider themselves shy. Wow! Then how come the majority of people in the two networking meetings I went to had no problem chatting away with someone else in the room?

They took that uncomfortable, shy feeling and turned it into an opportunity. They did not let it stop them from interacting.

Right when I walked into the lunch meeting, I looked around for someone to talk to. Everyone in the room was already talking. I wasn't sure how to go up to any of the pairs of people talking. So, I walked around uncomfortably looking at the plaques on the wall honoring past Chamber members, just waiting for a pair to break up. It didn't happen so then I sat down to wait for fresh meat. When a woman approached my empty table, I thought, "Finally. Somebody to network with!" My "shyness" isolated me as if I were on a deserted island waiting to be rescued.

2. Always leave the house with 10 times as many business cards as you think you need. The other day, I brought enough business cards for one meeting, not expecting an invitation to another. At the second meeting, I only had five cards to hand out among a group of 40 people. That required me to hand them out strategically. I would have preferred to hand one out to each person.

3. Action brings action. The action of getting out of the office to network increases your chances of receiving leads and referrals (incoming action). One example already mentioned is how I went to one meeting and ended up getting invited to another. The second meeting is really where I met some people I can see myself doing business with.

Learn from my lessons. Don't put yourself on a deserted island when you are in a room full of strangers. Don't wait to be approached. Take the uncomfortable feeling you feel and turn it into opportunity. You never know what that action will lead to.